I've got the blues over jeans

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

There is a shortage of denim. I know this without reading an article or taking a survey of jean companies. I know this by using my eyes.

Apparently there is not enough denim to make normal skirts or blue jeans anymore.

I'm not sure if anyone has noticed but girls are wearing their skirts as short as possible. Just the other day I saw a girl who was standing up move just a little bit and her skirt was so short it wrinkled a little bit and there was her underwear. Now, I am sure she is just a victim of the denim shortage rather than making a choice to wear a skirt that short.

I mean, why would a girl wear a skirt that short on purpose? Even if the girl bought some expensive Victoria's Secret underwear, you wouldn't think it would be that important to show it off when you are just standing there. And why would a girl's parents let her out of the house wearing a skirt so short? I mean if I was a father, my daughter wouldn't leave the house wearing anything shorter than an ankle-length skirt but then again I'm not father. And since I don't wear skirts, I was not notified of the denim shortage.

Now for guys, you might think the denim shortage would be a good thing, but it is impacting more than just the short skirts. Recently while looking for a pair of new blue jeans I was amazed to find that there was no longer a pair of new blue jeans.

I apparently missed the memo where all blue jeans are previously used. I couldn't find a pair of jeans that weren't stained or a dirty color blue.

Once again, I am not sure why anyone would purchase a pair of dirty jeans unless there was a denim shortage. Instead of making jeans from new denim, companies now must use used jeans, stitch them together as new and sell them as the new fad. We, as consumers, have no choice but to buy them because, well, we need to wear blue jeans.

I mean take the kids that are wearing the jeans with all of the holes in them. Apparently some jean companies have employees rifled through the trash and find pairs of discarded jeans. Then they put a $60 price tag on them and we are stupid enough to buy them. Why else would people buy jeans with holes in them?

And let us not forget the capri pants. When the jean companies do decide to make a normal color pair of jeans, the denim is in such short supply that they can't even make the pant length correctly.

Somebody should tell the people at these jean companies that pants that end just below the knee don't look good on anybody, especially guys. While they are good for wading in high water, they just look like pants someone washed instead of dry cleaned.

It seems like we are now paying for the overuse of denim in the past, like the big carpenter pants age of the early '90s. If we would have only known then what we know now, maybe young ladies would be able to leave the house with a respectable skirt length and I might be able to find a normal pair of blue jeans. However, I'm afraid the going trend will leave young ladies skirtless in the future and men forced to go back to the baggy MC Hammer pants of the late '80s.

Oh, the horror.

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