Speakout

Stay outta my yard

I just want to say to the people out here on Pharris Ridge, these concrete things out here are called driveways. Don't drive through my yard, buddy!

The last call

This will be the last time I call to complain about this. I just came through Kelso, selling their gas for $1.79. I think that's a rip-off. I think it should be against the law. I just came back from St. Louis yesterday and their gas was $1.38. So what I did, I got a gallon of that gas and got a gallon from here in town. I poured them both in a glass jar. The gas from St. Louis is so much cleaner. Even a dummy like me could see it. You can tell the difference. Mike Jensen always tells us to buy local. Why buy local when you're getting s*$#@? If St. Louis can sell their gas that cheap then we can.

Eye don't see it

I just got my eyes examined and got some new glasses. I went to donate my old glasses over at the bank at the Lions' drop-off box and it wasn't there. I just need to know where I can drop off my glasses that are in pretty good shape.

Trumped up

This is in response to Trump won't make it. He will make it. He's the only honest one that really tells the facts. He might have a big mouth and a smart mouth, but everything he says he has proven. Trump all the way