Speakout

Batman and bands

Anyone having pictures of the Batman Club in Sikeston or pictures of the 1968 State Battle of the Bands at the Rodeo grounds, preferably first, second and third place winners of the contest, call 379-3882 in Portageville.

Funky smelling tobacco

I'm reading in the paper about the cats not leaving their feces in the yard and not smelling. Whoever put this in SpeakOut can come over to East Prairie and I can give them some feces laying in the yard that's smelling. You can't mow or walk without stepping in it. They don't bury it, it's on top of the ground. I can give them some of this good smelling stuff to put in their pipe and smoke it.

Cats continue. . .

I just want to say that I detest cats. They don't leave feces in their yard, instead they take a dump in the neighbor's flower beds. And you know where that ends up - on the neighbor's gloves when gardening. They broke my hummingbird feeder by sitting on my deck rail and jumping at the birds. People on TV let them lick them and kiss them, and you know what they spend their time licking. They sure are clean animals though. Their stools smell worse than any squirrel guts you'll ever smell. But they sure are sweet!

Get ready to work

On the immigration law, about someone wanting the number to call report illegal aliens. I can tell them that they better have their finger on redial because about 80 percent of them are illegal. Honey, you better get that finger ready 'cause you're going to have to work it. Then you better get your behind ready 'cause you're going to have to work and fill in for their jobs because people won't work.

Don't sweat the small stuff

This is to the person that lives in the South Ridge Estates behind Lowe's. If you're so worried about the shed back there, you need to find something else to worry about. There are a multitude of other things in this world that are going on that you could gripe and complain about other than somebody's woodshed.

Newshound

I would like to address the thieving, low-life that continues to steal my newspaper. Don't think for one minute that I don't know who you are. I will eventually catch you, and when I do, I'll press charges. Then I won't have to worry about you stealing my paper because your thieving butt will be in jail where it belongs.