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Harold Ponder
LILBOURN, Mo. — Harold H. Ponder, 91, of Lilbourn passed away on Oct. 7, 2023, at the Barathaven Alzheimer’s Special Care Center in Dardenne Prairie, Missouri.
He was born Dec. 17, 1931, in St. Louis, Missouri, to the late Homer Lee and Grace Evelyn Hulbert Ponder.
In addition to his parents, he was preceded in death by his wife Frances.
Survived by one son, Lonnie Ponder; one daughter, Linda (Scott) Seal; three grandchildren; and four great-grandchildren.
In 1944, the Ponders moved to Lilbourn where his parents established the Ponder Funeral Home. Upon graduating Lilbourn High School in 1950, he briefly served in the United States Air Force during the Korean Conflict. He attended and graduated mortuary school in Louisville Kentucky. While attending Mortuary School, he met a young student Frances “Smitty” Smith at the Norton Memorial School of Nursing around the corner on a blind date. They married on June 22, 1956, within six months of meeting. They were married in their Minister’s apartment with only their parents, best man, Joe Jones and matron of honor and sister, Anna Mae. The remainder of their time in Louisville while finishing school they lived in a boarding house. Upon completing their schooling, they moved to Lilbourn where Harold returned to the family funeral business and Frances did private duty nursing followed by working for the New Madrid County Health Department. Harold always enjoyed spending time with her, other family and friends and tinkering. He loved his church and his community. He served many positions at the church, trustee and church clerk to name a couple. He was on the Library and Park Boards for several years throughout his life. He was Past President of the Kiwanis Club, he served as alderman and City Clerk. He was the organizer for the Summer Fun Days for many years. He supported the fire department prior to the 911 system by being the whistleblower. Since his childhood he had assisted in one way or another with the City of Lilbourn’s Christmas lights. He was a Charter member of New Madrid County VFW Post 7183 in Lilbourn. He was a member of the R/C Flying Club in Sikeston.
One of his biggest joys in life was spending time with Frances. During their working years they went to Barkley Lake as often as they could. He enjoyed bass fishing and taking the kids water skiing. Later he enjoyed his life-long dream of having a sailboat. After Frances retired in 1995, they enjoyed traveling the country. They visited 49 of the 50 United States and all of the Canadian provinces and territories. Harold was fortunate enough to have stopped over in Hawaii during his brief service in the Air Force.
In 1982 along with his father and wife they purchased the Crews Welsh Funeral Home in Sikeston. In 1992, they moved the funeral home building, a new facility, and changed the name to Ponder Funeral Home. He was very proud of his son Lonnie for continuing a successful family business.
On Oct. 4, 2009, Frances suffered a major stroke, a major blow to the couple. Harold had to learn how to do things he had never done before. The kids always joked that if something happened to Mom that Dad would be in trouble as he could only cook peanut butter sandwiches. With her help he learned to cook all kinds of things. As hard as it was on Harold they continued to travel. They attended two NASCAR races each year until their final race in May 2016 at Charlotte Motor Speedway. At this point, Harold said it was just too much, and Frances agreed.
Jan. 4, 2020, she and Harold admitted themselves to the Lutheran Home in Cape Girardeau, Missouri, in hopes that it would only be until she was strong enough to go back home to their little house in Lilbourn. It wasn’t long however that they both realized that they would not be able to return home and would live out their remaining days in the Lutheran Home. Aug. 27, 2021, they moved to Barathaven Alzheimer’s Special Care Center in Dardenne Prairie so Harold could receive better care for his condition and they would be closer to their daughter, Linda.
On Dec. 25, 2021, Frances passed away leaving Harold alone. He fortunately was spared due to his condition much of the pain and heartache he would have endured. Visitation will be from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 12 at the First Baptist Church of Lilbourn, where services will be held on Friday, Oct. 13 at 10 a.m. with Pastor Allen Nichols officiating.
Pallbearers will be: David Graham, Jimmy King, Jamie King, Andy Weeks, Jerry Webb Duncan and Dr. William Turner.