Manning up to the conversation

Sometimes office conversations take a turn that nobody sees coming. A name may spark a funny conversation or even a news story that comes through may get some laughs. But sometimes these conversations get way out of control.

One such conversation happened last week when a simple story about Bruce Jenner led to a whole nutty conversation that continued for days.

For those that aren't aware, Bruce Jenner, the famous decathlete from the '70s and stepfather to the Kardashians, has decided to transition from a man to a woman. And because the population's IQ is dropping at a rapid rate and they now have to watch reality shows about everything (What else explains Honey Boo Boo?), Jenner is going to have a reality show about his transformation.

I have no interest in watching a show about a man becoming a woman. But I don't need to see the program to know it will be one awkward reality show, especially when his children are involved. Do they still call him dad or do they call him mom? What kind of interaction will they have?

"Hey Dad, can I borrow your bra?"

"Silly Daddy, don't you know that's the wrong shade of eye shadow?"

Of course these questions were brought up in the office and led to much more poignant questions. Those being how far is he going to go in the transformation and what happens if he goes the whole way?

Namely is he going to have his... ahem... member removed. The thoughts on this varied but my question went beyond that. If he does have it removed, what happens to it?

Some in the office said it might be kept as a memento. I'm not sure that is something I would want to put in the jar up on the mantle.

"Oh that? That is my last remaining memory from when I used to be a man so I keep it in a jar on my mantle with my Olympic medal."

It doesn't seem like something you would just throw away, but I thought maybe it could be donated to a woman who wanted to become a man. You know, a pay-it-forward, donation, type of thing.

I'm not a doctor but I thought that made the most sense and was the least wasteful. Others in the office thought different and wanted me to use the Google to find out if that was even possible.

Now there is a line I draw on what I look up on a computer, especially my work computer. Penis removal or penis donation are just a couple of the things I don't want on my computer history. Not to mention I didn't necessarily want to see some of the things the Google might come up with. I sometimes get shocked when I look up something innocent, like Inspector Gadget. (If you don't believe me, look it up)

So a colleague looked up something on penis removal and it seems that penis donation, while possible in rare cases, is extremely uncommon. Well, I wasn't shocked as many of my ideas are a bit far-fetched.

Apparently using someone else's member might be traumatic to the one receiving it. Not that switching sex isn't already traumatic.

Instead my co-worker found they use elbow skin and sew it on down below and I guess create the unit out of that. Something about a prosthesis can be added later or something. At that point they lost me with elbow skin and I was sorry I ever heard the name Bruce Jenner.

Of course, I'm sure his reality show will be must see TV and we will hear plenty about him in the future. Or will we hear plenty about her? I'm so confused. Maybe Honey Boo Boo is on.